In the words of Robert Kegan…”If 5 frogs were on a log and 3 wanted to jump off, how many are left on the log?” You want to say 2 don’t you? Well there’s a big difference between what we say we want to do and what we actually do. Those 5 frogs are still on the log, goal conflict or competing commitments are holding the 3 there that wanted to jump.
How can we improve the chance of achieving our goals? We can use tried and tested methodologies for goals setting eg: SMART, PPPP (Positive, Personal, Possible, Prioritised), Visualisation, Rewarding achievements, OGTM (Objectives, Goals, Tactics, Metrics), all of these, and more may help us to define our goals and gain clarity on what we need to do. So why is it that we often still fail to realise our goals?
It’s because there are other beliefs/assumptions/commitments/ behaviours that are competing with our goal, and these overpower our desire to achieve our goal. These competing factors may not be obvious to us until we take the time to explore them. One simple technique is to ask yourself the following questions – What would be my biggest worry if I did achieve my goal? What assumptions am I making about my goal? What am I telling myself that is preventing me from leaping forward toward my goals? What mindset am I in – fixed or growth? Do I truly believe I can achieve it?
Robert Biswas-Diener talks about goal conflict, where two or more goals are competing against each other. Kegan and Lahey in their Immunity to Change framework talk about behaviours that keep you from achieving your goal and understanding competing commitments and assumptions.
We’ll be exploring these very topics on the LEAP Programme in Bali July 26-31. Join us to find out more about how you can close that gap between your aspirations and achievement.